Dear Smandrew Smutson,
January 31st, 2006 | by Scott Jennings |I’ve only just now recieved your message.
All I could possibly ask is that you be as obnoxious an American as possible. Like, you know, giant American flag, airhorns, cowboy hat on top of a New York Giants helmet, the new Angus steak pizza from Domino’s, a seat cushion with the Iraqi flag (so you can sit your ass down on Osama), plenty of bobblehead dolls (any type will do) to pass out to underprivledged Italian kids, stuff like that.
Bonus points if you carry a massive sign cheering on the “HOT CURLING SISTERS” and loudly urge them to “drop the stones and dyke out on each other.”
Thanks in advance for your loyal compliance,
Scott
