jennings rampage

$120 stupidity tax.

September 22nd, 2008 | by Scott Jennings |

Here’s what they don’t tell you when you calculate the total cost of ownership of an iPhone: if you’re stupid, it’ll cost you more. But thanks to the Apple Store’s emailed receipts, I have a virtual paper trail of my stupidity.

On October 9, 2007, I bought my iPhone, and immediately began enjoying it very much. Then one day, I did my laundry and realized afterwards that my iPhone headphones were in the front pockets of my jeans, so…

On February 26, 2008, I bought a replacement set of iPhone headphones, and enjoyed them very much. Then one night I drove to Greensboro, got in very late, and in the shuffle and confusion lost my headphones, so…

On April 1, 2008, I bought a replacement set of iPhone headphones, and enjoyed them very much. Then I moved to a much smaller apartment, and before everything had a place and everything was in its place I left my headphones on the floor next to my bed and promptly stepped on them, so…

On August 22, 2008, I bought a replacement set of iPhone headphones, and enjoyed them very much. Then yesterday evening, I was exhausted when I got home, and threw my headphones on my bed instead of putting them in the Ikea hanging cubby in the closet. Well, Bella only needed a minute to finally get her revenge on those tantalizing wires, so…

On September 22, 2008, I’m going to buy a replacement set of iPhone headphones on my way home from work, because I can’t ride the train or go to the gym without headphones. This will be my fifth set in less than a year. I joked with the Apple Store employee about getting a punch card to buy ten and get my eleventh set free, but I’m serious now: they should cut me a break.