jennings rampage

How the Presidential election is REALLY like The West Wing.

Many have observed the similarities between the 2008 Presidential election and the 2006 fictional Presidential election on the greatest television show of all time, The West Wing. Both elections on first glance feature a young, handsome, relatively unknown ethnic member of Congress with a seriously hot wife and adorable kids running on a grassroots and idealistic movement up against an older senator from a Western state with wide bipartisan support and a record of mavericky independence. The young idealist balances his ticket with an old party hand to fill the gaps in his credentials, and the experienced senator has a great relationship with the press and a very established moderate “brand” to lean on.

And that’s how Obama’s been running his campaign: as though his opponent were Arnold Vinick, the fictional Republican nominee. Vinick was plain-spoken, honest, thorough, and deserved that reputation. Alan Alda don’t take no crap. Matt Santos, the fictional Democratic nominee, had to attack Vinick on his strength, mount a campaign of ideas, and the result was a very high-minded affair that respected Vinick’s record and sought to persuade voters on the policy differences.

But as it turns out, Obama’s opponent isn’t Arnold Vinick, it’s John McCain. And maybe at one point in his career John McCain was the inspiration for the West Wing writers, but as we know, he got old and desperate and has transformed into another West Wing character: Robert Ritchie, the faux-folksie aw-shucks governor from Florida who lost in a landslide to Jed Bartlet in 2002.

How did Bartlet crush Ritchie? Basically:

• Ritchie tried to make the campaign about personality rather than issues, running on a platform of “I don’t like Bartlet because he’s an intellectual snob.” Bartlet tried responding by wearing sweaters and dumbing down, but that was quickly rejected. Bartlet kept pounding on the issues, making it obvious that Ritchie wasn’t as prepared. This tactic is a liberal fantasy.
• While being interviewed by a local news station, and thinking he was off the air, Bartlet let slip that he thought Ritchie was too dumb to be President. Of course, Josiah Bartlet is the Smartest Man Alive, so he knew exactly what he was doing, and it WORKED — the press began to question Ritchie’s intelligence, and it was the beginning of the end for the dumb dummy, because Americans would never elect a dumb dumb dummy. This tactic is also liberal fantasy.
• At the debate, Bartlet effectively demonstrates his opponents hypocrisies, most notably his demands for a smaller government in contrast to all his home state takes in Federal expenditures. Bartlet quips, “Can we have it back, please?” and holy crap IT’S ALL OVER.  This tactic is the closest to reality.

So what should Obama learn? McCain is handing Obama hours and hours of contradictory and hypocritical footage, just waiting to be cut thirty seconds at a time. My friend Chris believes every Obama commercial from here on out ought to be McCain debating McCain, and that sounds about right to me. By the time the debates roll around, the narrative needs to be framed as “McCain the doddering old flip-flopper,” and Obama has to drive it home: John McCain used to be an independent thinker, but he sold it all out for a shot at being President.

Or… we could just make it about beer and lipstick and moose and being a shitty pilot and getting your ass caught by Charlie or whatever it is we talk about all the time. These fucking Republicans are fucking geniuses: they’ve successfully pivoted to Obama vs. Palin, change in the form of the windbag law professor (*cough*black*cough*) vs. change in the form of the plucky charming sassy uber-mom. And they’ve got traction! So we can do that instead. Either way.