Archive for the ‘SUBURBAN RUT’ Category
Tuesday, August 28th, 2007
Dear [former landlady]:
I just want to clarify a few things. I know you're going to keep my full deposit because you're the landlady and you're better at this than I am, but I want to be clear on a few things.
- I paid the pet deposit to the original management ...
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Saturday, August 18th, 2007
Gigantic mall!
Gigantic movie theater!
Target!
Parking in parking lots!
Driving!
Full service gas!
NEW JERSEY, baby!
Five stars! I'll be back!
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Thursday, July 5th, 2007
It was July 5th, the day after a national holiday. My boss and my coworker were both out. I was just back from the gym, my hair was still damp and my skin still flushed and my brow still a little beaded, that shower never quite takes. My VP came ...
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Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007
Tonight I had a duck confit poutine that was simply zomg. And a cheese plate that included a brie with champignon that I could not believe either, but who's counting?
It looks like the jury is back, and yes folks, here's the verdict: The Federal > Milltown.
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Thursday, June 28th, 2007
lauren: i still dont really like facebook
me: nonsense.
lauren: and i only log in to poke you back.
me: HA! I WIN THE POKE WAR! it took three months, BUT I WIN.
lauren: wait. because i acknowledged it?
thats grounds for losing?
me: yep!
sorry!
lauren: who died and made you gov'na of the poke wars?
me: ummm, ...
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Wednesday, June 20th, 2007
Oh man. I was going to have the best personalized license plate EVAR. I scoped it out on the DMV website, it was totes available, all I had to do was pay my county vehicle tax and renew my registration, and it was going to be MINE.
This was a couple ...
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Friday, June 8th, 2007
I went to Whole Foods (because I'm still sick of all these fucking partial foods) last night to pick up the ingredients for chicken mole, my current culinary obsession. I make a mean mole.
Back at the butcher's counter, a lady butcher I'd never seen before came up to me, and ...
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Monday, May 28th, 2007
Fine, dogs are cute, they're loving, they're endearing, but IT NEVER ENDS. If you don't want to deal with a cat, you throw it off the couch and it says, "fine asshole, I didn't want to see you anyway." The dogs don't give you a choice.
This is Daisy. She's a ...
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Sunday, May 27th, 2007
What a DAY!
I ran two and a quarter MILES on a TRAIL in the WOODS!
I rode a SEGWAY!
I drove an ATV!
I saw a whole bunch of COOL SHIT that I can't talk about on the INTERNET!
I cut OAK with a CHAINSAW!
I had a turkey SANDWICH for LUNCH!
I went to WAL-MART!
I ...
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Friday, May 11th, 2007
Fourteen hours later:
Let it fall apart, add sauce:
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